Alright, I know that I have at least one of these posts every busy season, BUT oh well.
I HATE January through April. Seriously, starting like January 8th we don't see Ryan AT. ALL. He leaves at 7:00 in the morning and gets home at 10 or 11 or later. I just don't get it.
I am going crazy. I miss Ryan. I can't handle the boys. Ryan only worked until 1:00 on Saturday so he watched the boys while I went out for an hour or so just to do nothing. It was the first time I'd been away from the boys (other than the gym) in a LONG time.
It's hard because the boys miss Ryan too and he misses them. So when he does see them (on Saturday (sometimes) and Sundays (in between meetings) he and they want to spend time with each other. I, on the other hand, am sick of the boys so I just want to spend time with Ryan. But if I want to see Ryan then that means the boys are there too. I would feel bad if Ryan didn't see the boys so that makes it a lose/lose situation.
Last week I was going to take the boys to Ryan's work for dinner BUT Ryan couldn't. The partners were there and so they were ultra busy. They eat lunch and dinner while working. No breaks. Isn't that against the law or something? I thought you had to have so many breaks while working that many hours?
I'm back on my diet thing now which surprisingly, is going really well. However, I'm a lot more skeptical of it this time. I don't think I will lose as much, which makes me mad and then I feel like poop. Why can't I be happy with the way I look? I think even IF I got down to my goal weight...I wouldn't be happy. After the last two diet games (I had lost 25 pounds) I felt fabulous. I felt confident and that I looked freaking awesome. Then, one day I didn't feel like that anymore. No, i didn't gain any weight back or anything...it's just a stupid mental game. Is it because I'm a girl or is it because I'm Krista?
Last week, whenever anybody asked me how I was doing I would start crying BUT I would say "Fine" and they had no idea tears were flowing. Except...that one time that I actually couldn't cover it up. I don't even know what the deal was though really. Well, maybe I do. I never see my husband. I hate my body (alright my stomach). The kids are driving me crazy. Last week there was 2 snow days so Kyler didn't have school those days and man....was it hard. Today it's snowing again and as much fun as it is to play in the snow...Ky and Strides HATE it so it doesn't happen. I seriously want spring here. I want to be able to sit outside and watch the boys ride their bikes. I want to go to the park EVERY SINGLE DAY (like last year). I want it to be sunny. I think if busy season was during spring, summer or fall, ANYTHING BUT WINTER, it would be SO much easier. But no, it's not, so I will just wallow in self-pity until my sister comes in March. Yeah...something to look forward too.
Alright, so what's the point to this post...absolutely nothing.
But in case your wondering...I'm fine. Really, I am. I have a GREAT mom that doesn't have the guts to hang up on her crying daughter...so she makes me feel better a lot . (and I'm not looking for sympathy comments or anything... I'm just writing it down)
12 comments:
Sending hugs.
Hang tuff, sista!!!
I will always hate tax season. I miss Jared and the boys miss Jared. However, with this being the 6th time we've been through it, I have to say that it does seem to get easier. There are definately good days and bad days. And I am already counting down the days til it's over (and praying for warmer weather like you). I guess I've just come to accept that Jared is doing his best to take care of us, and knowing that I've survived it before means I can survive it again. You'll make it!
That sucks Krista, I know that you weren't looking for sympathy, but I am so sorry! Hang in there, you are a good example for the rest of us that are stay at home moms with too much on our plate and that live far far away from our families! I love ya!
Oh I have so many days like that. Hang in there. YOu are a great mom and just remember tax season will come to an end. I wish I was a little closer so I could watch your boys for you so you could have a break!!!
You are not alone in alot of these feelings Krista. Granted my husband isn't an accountant but the winters alone are hard for me and probalby even more so now that I'm at home and not working outside the home. Take the time you need for yourself. Try putting the boys to bed early Saturday nights or something so you guys can have some alone time yourelves. It helps alot. Levi and I made that deal for eachother becuase we were both going crazy. Hang in there but remember you aren't the only one that feels tha way so it doesn't make you any less of a mom or wife. Praying helps alot:) Hang in there!
I know a firm in Cut Bank that would hire Ryan on the spot. He could come home every day at lunch and dinner and that would help alot. You could even eat at your in-laws and your mother-in-law would watch the boys in the evenings for you. So we don't have a WalMart!?!?! It is only 2 hours away.
Ok Krista, I just happened to click on a link to your blog from... I can't even remember whose blog I clicked from. Anyway, I ran cross country with you I don't know if you will remember me, Emily Neilson? I'm Emily Simmons now but that doesn't matter. My husband is also an Accountant and working busy season. I only have one child and I am going crazy. I don't know how you do it. Really, kudos to you. I am so impressed. I am praying for warm weather for all of the accountant wives who are going crazy. It would make me so much happier to get outside. Good luck!
I"m counting down the days! I can't even wait.. so keep it up til I get there and you can lay it all on me. Love you sis!
I totally sympathize with ya sister! For the last 5 years Chris has worked 2 jobs. He leaves at 8AM and doesn't get home till after midnight. It sucks for a long time. Then after a long time is over, it starts to become the "normal" and life goes on. I do feel for you. I know how much it sucks.
ahh my little tuna...how i love you! you are amazing & i hope you never forget that:)
love you
Winter sucks.
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